How to Apply The 5 Love Languages to Customer Success

Do you know your love language? According to Dr. Gary Chapman, every person has a primary love language in which they need to be spoken to in order to feel cared for and loved. The five love languages include:

  1. Receiving Gifts
  2. Quality Time
  3. Words of Affirmation
  4. Physical Touch
  5. Acts of Service

While Dr. Chapman’s original research on this topic was intended for use in romantic relationships, it has since been expanded to apply to any type of relationship – including between an organization and its customers. So, in honor of Valentine’s Day, let’s take a look at how you can apply the five love languages to customer success.   

Receiving Gifts

What’s better than receiving a gift on your birthday, a holiday or other special occasion? Receiving a surprise gift! Surprising customers with a gift is a great way to reward them for their support and to motivate them to keep making progress on their goals. A customer gift doesn’t need to be expensive or even something tangible. A small token of your appreciation can go a long way towards making your customer feel like they are important to you.  

Actions You Can Take Today

  • Offer a special discount on a new product, feature or renewal
  • Invite customers to trial a new feature 
  • Provide early access to a new educational resource or event

Quality Time

In order for any type of relationship to be successful, it’s important to spend meaningful, quality time with one another. Quality time doesn’t have to mean taking your customer out for a nice meal or inviting them to a special event (which is much more difficult in our post-COVID world). Instead, there are a number of small ways you can provide your customer with quality interactions through virtual methods. 


Actions You Can Take Today

  • Be attentive in out-of-product channels (i.e. through support conversations)
  • Provide more in-product personalization 
  • Use gamification methods to encourage customers to use and engage with your product regularly

Words of Affirmation

Who doesn’t love receiving a compliment or a kind word? Providing words of affirmation to your customers is perhaps the simplest of the five love languages to implement into your customer success strategy. Sending your customer a simple thank you, congratulations or good job message is an easy way to show appreciation and to motivate them to continue doing what they’re doing.

Actions You Can Take Today

  • Send a congratulatory email when they reach a key milestone, such as finishing onboarding or adding a certain number of new users
  • Shoutout a customer on social media on special occasions, like anniversaries
  • Send a handwritten thank you note to a customer expressing your gratitude for their loyalty and support of your company

Physical Touch

Obviously, this love language shouldn’t be taken literally when applied to the workplace and your client relationships. However, one way you can apply the concept of physical touch to customer success is by creating real-life scenarios that give customers a chance to experience a physical connection with your company and get to know the real people on the other side of those digital messages. 

Actions You Can Take Today


  • Schedule a video chat or phone call
  • Hold a webinar
  • Host an in-person or virtual event or conference 

Acts of Service

The concept behind “Acts of Service” is simply to ease some of the burden of responsibility that is weighing on the other person. In customer success, you can apply this love language by gaining deeper insight into your customers’ needs and learning how to predict what they want/need before it happens, so they aren’t constantly having to reach out to you for help. By giving them what they need before they even realize they need it, you will help create a positive and valuable experience for your customers. Totango’s SuccessPlays makes this simple by allowing you to set up automated tasks or actions that are triggered when they match pre-defined criteria.

Actions You Can Take Today

  • Send reminders when renewal time is approaching so customers can evaluate their renewal and upgrade options
  • Reach out to customers who are showing decreased usage or signs of churn to help overcome issues or roadblocks
  • Check in with customers at regular intervals to ensure they are getting the value they need from your product

Show Your Customers Some Love 

How to apply the 5 love languages to customer successValentine’s Day is a great opportunity to show your customers how much you appreciate their loyalty and support by sending them a celebratory email. To help you do this, we’ve created multiple Valentine’s Day themed emails that you can use for free. Check them out in the Campaigns tab in any of your SuccessBLOCs to get started and show your customer’s some Valentine’s love today!  

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